O.o (nanofemto) wrote in humoursection,
O.o
nanofemto
humoursection

Ask a Stupid Question

Maybe this should be titled, "Here's your sign." Anyway, I got this in my inbox today:


A stupid question deserves an appropriate answer....I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina for my Labrador Retriever and was in line to check out.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy behind her.

Horrified, she asked if I'd been poisoned by something in the dog food and was that why I was in the hospital.

I said no.....I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me.


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